Ok before I start writing let me rant first. My saved draft for this entry (which’s 80% completed) is gone gone gone when I wanna continue writing it! Damn it! I knew I can’t trust my iPhone 100%. Bummer.
I woke up in the middle of the night ytd and I felt myself drifting back to my lala land easily. You know the state where you know you’re about to go into deep sleep but you’re still a tad conscious on whatever that’s gg on around you? I was in that zone when suddenly I realized I’ve difficulties breathing. I opened my eyes and tried to move my limbs to change my sleeping position but after a few futile attempts, again, I realized I’ve no control over my body! I tried calling out to Joey for help and in my mind I’m already screaming aloud kind however, not even a wheeze or gasp escape from my mouth- it’s like my voice was trapped in my throat and there’s no escaping.
I was totally in panic mode by then already. Reminding myself to at least continue breathing through my nose/mouth/whatever just breathe and I concentrated real hard to move my upper body. What seems to be a gargantuan effort on my part & in my mind, in reality I actually just sort of twitched and have a spasm of sort.
When I finally moved it seems like a fog surrounding me is lifted and whatever that’s preventing me to breathe is gone as well. I gasped for air and boyyyyy it felt real good to be breathing normally again.
Joey was awaken by my gasping sound and I remembered telling him continuously that “I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe.”
I tried sleeping but that whole cycle just kept repeating itself for around 4-5 times and each time the period of time where I’m “paralyzed” varies from each other. But from the second or third time onwards, I can actually sense when it’s gg to happen again.
I’ll feel like a “bubble” is enveloping me, and that feeling felt the strongest when it’s nearing my head. When it’s finally “sealed” I can’t breathe nor move normally. And every single time I’ll have to break through that state on my own cause I can’t even call out to Joey for help! I rmb on one time, my fingers were actually resting on Joey’s hand and I tried to grasp my fingers around his hand to let him know that I can’t breathe again (and pls save me for goodness sake!) but no matter how many times I tried my damn fingers just won’t budge. I am damn sure my brain is doing it’s job by sending messages to my limbs but my muscles/neuron system/whatever bio term it is, is not doing it’s job by receiving it and executing it!!!! Horrible horrible feeling to have. I felt damn helpless!
Afterwards I finally fall asleep again without anything happening to me.
This morning Joey told me I was having a spasm last night. I looked at him and told him in details on what happened and his eyes went wide and he said, “鬼压身？” Crap man. I didn’t think of that lor! And when he told me I was like… =_=”
But I know this kind of symptom does happen to people and there’s a scientific reason behind it one la. Like too tired or something, haven’t go and google it to find out more but I’m sure it has cause I read it in the newspaper before.
But it’s fucking scary and I’m kinda dreading to sleep tonight after typing this entry. Crap. 😦