亲爱的,那并不是爱情

Are you the sort who will go tumbling straight into the big love trap rather quickly and without giving it much thoughts to it? You find yourself enjoying the process of getting to know each other better, you can’t wait to receive his/her smses and calls and you simply wish time will pass faster so you can see him/her yet again and spend a lovely evening together. You then think to yourself excitedly, “well.. I must be in love!”

Hold your horses right there hun, because I don’t think it seems to be the case.

You maybe infatuated with that certain someone, but it certainly isn’t love.

Infatuation is so goddamn easy. Anyone can easily be infatuated with someone as long as that person is someone whom they can click with- be it man or woman. Just anyone who’s on the same wave length as you. And of course, preferably someone with cute looks will be a plus point. Just think about this.. you met this (cute) stranger at a cafe. He’s seated just next to you and somehow you guys just started talking.. over something. You guys hit it off well, he bought you a drink, blahblahblah.. exchange contacts.. blahblahblah.. hang out a few times.. blahblahblah. You feel happy when you’re hanging out with him. But is that love? No. I really don’t think so. Although infatuation can lead to something more over time, but most of the time I think you’ll just find that sizzle dwindling down and you realised your interest in that someone is well.. not as strong as before. I read it from somewhere that an infatuation with someone can lasts up to a year and only afterwards its then considered love. But a friend of mine read from another source saying that the first three years is just “liking” and after the three years benchmark, then its considered love. See how complicating that is?! (so irritating but yet so many people out there are willing to be tangled in this messy web of emotions inclusive of yours truly. hahaha)

Anyway, to sidetrack. I think I’m someone who will take the initiative to go and befriend/find out more about this particular person if he/she intrigues me through their twitter, Facebook, blogs, from hear say. (and at the same time, I can be the most unfriendly/quiet person around with people whom I don’t like)  I’ve exchanged random messages in FB/MSN/Whatsapp with them as well. Its a mixture of both female & male though I would say most of them are female. The point here is, if you have this urge to know someone better and you find yourself enjoying the process, that doesn’t necessarily meant you’re in love with them. If thats the case you’ll be 见一个,爱一个 right?!

The word “love” envelops a lot of meaning & commitment behind it. Its such a powerful word that in the past I’ll think twice before saying ILY to Joey- I’m freaking serious. I’ll be thinking to myself, “Ok, how do you know you really love him? Perhaps you just like him very very very much? Or you’re just really comfortable with him?” and I’ll proceed to torture myself with these questions. analyse it real carefully. (I would love to throw all caution to the wind but I’m not that kind of person even though I would love to. Maybe I will be.. but for just a short while) If I don’t feel it, seriously, I won’t say it.

If you find yourself feeling a little something for someone and you’re wondering whether is it love, just imagine him/her into someone else; but doing the same things and all, will you find yourself “falling” for the person as well? Will you have the same feelings you’re experiencing right now? Are you falling in love with the person, or are you falling in love with the whole fairytale-ish situation? Or are you merely falling in love with Love itself? The endorphins, butterflies in stomach, that happy glow in you and the thought that you will be lonely no more? If you’re starting to doubt yourself now (even the smallest one), then I think its good if you can give yourself some time & space to think over and to take things slow.

Ok. Just saying. Just my thoughts. Sorry if it doesn’t make sense to you!

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